Conan O'Brien signs off from Late Night

Friday night saw Conan's final appearance as the host of Late Night.  The following clip is a video of Conan's favourite skit from his 16 year tenure.

Freaky Eaters (BBC Three, Saturday 7pm)

The new season of Freaky Eaters started last week, and to be honest its the kind of show i usually avoid; I can't stand shows where 'psychologists' 'treat' 'people' by 'confronting' them with their worst 'fears.'  BBC Three is actually a huge culprit, Spendaholics for example was a complete mess of a show.  How does filling a room with potatoes and saying "this is how many potatoes you could have bought with the money you spent on that dress" cure anyone? It doesn't. 

The difference with Freaky Eaters is at least you can laugh your head off at the poor sap who can't put a vegetable past their lips without gagging. This episode was no different it was hilarious.  It was about Bolton lass Nikita who was addicted to Bacon and Burgers; supposedly brought on by a mugging. The show consisted of scene after scene of Nikita trying to eat different foods before gagging and spitting them out. I think you'll agree this is just the kind of TV you want to settle down with over a nice take away.

Turns out Nikita used to enjoy signing as a child; cue one of the most humiliating, cringe inducing, but frankly laugh a second scenes i've seen on television this year. They make a now heavily overweight and under-confident Nikita dress up in a prom dress, take her to the clothes show in Birmingham, and have her sing "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion. 

Guess what, she can't do it, she bursts out in tears while small utterances and squeaks emerge from her gullet, it was kind of like watching her eat. More to the point what in gods name has this got to do with an eating disorder. After i stopped laughing, i suddenly started to feel an incredible remorse; what has this poor lass done to deserve being humiliated on television in-front of thousands of people.  Passing this kind of tat off as Psychology is bordering on offensive. If it wasn't such good TV i'd be writing to the Daily Mail. 

This episode is still available on Iplayer as we speak and i highly recommend a watch; plus you get to see the greatest town in Britain in all its filth encrusted glory. 

7/10

Conan O'Brien

Coninuing our tribute to Late Night with Conan O'Brien here is  a look at Conan giving a lucky audience member a tour of 30 Rockefeller Centre.

Conan runs through 30 Rockefeller Center - watch more funny videos

Another great clip; How Conan and the gang kept their sanity during the writers strike.

Conan O'Brien Plays Rock Band - A funny movie is a click away

Conan O'Brien

As Conan's tenure on Late Night comes to a close before he moves to the coverted Tonight Show we are going to take a look at some highlights from his 16 years as king of late night.

Important Things With Demetri Martin

Demetri Martin first came to the worlds attention on Comedy Centrals The Daily Show. He was the youth reporter and investigated all things yoof in his segment Trendspotting.
He now has his own series on Comedy Central wednesdays at 10pm called Importnat Things With Demetri Martin. 

Here is a brilliant segment from one of Demetri's early appearances on The Daily Show.

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Trendspotting

Daily Show Full Episodes
Important Things With Demetri Martin

Funny Political News
Joke of the Day

Coleen's Real Women and Media Nepotism

After flicking around the tv schedule the rags to riches story that is Coleen Rooney jumped out at me. The first thought that came to me was, if Wayne Rooney the ubiquitous footballer had his own show Wayne's Real Men that would be the greatest piece of tv since well Coleen's real women. Whereas Coleen looks to make the "average" woman the catwalk queen, I feel Wayne's hunt for the next great shakespearan actor amongst home and away football fans could be gripping.

The question arises from Coleen's show - is what makes a woman attractive? In this episode she pits her "real women" against the professional models to decide who might have the chance to advertise magnum ice creams. First of all these "real woman" are all beautful women - how real the experiment is may be questionable, are magnum merely using the show for promotion, well of course they are.  However this show demonstrates something intersting. This show demonstrates the imporantance of opportunity.

Throughout the media industry who gets work and careers appears to be all about opportunity, who you know and who they know. 

Coleen for example, who it appears is natuaral on camera and as presenters go she is not at all bad. She has however got the job purely because of opportunity. She happened to grow up in the same area of Liverpool as part neanderthal part footballing genius. Wayne was fortunate to avoid any serious injury and sailed his way to the top of his profession. Coleen his long term girlfriend and now wife went along for the ride. As fame drew itself to Wayne so it did for Coleen, she slowly grew her profile by just existing. She seemingly developed an everywoman profile which appealed to a brethren and was enhanced by Wayne's indiscretions. In being Wayne Rooney's girlfriend and becoming famous she had opportunity thrust upon her from all angles. 
She comes from a poor background and with no familar legacy in media and has become a sucess. She is now passing this on to the "real women" in her show.

Nepotism is rampant in media, as represented by Richard and Jusy's erstwhile "doing it on my own" daughter Chole, who took up a job on their show on channel 4 and now as a reporter on their barely watched "new position". According to a report in the Daily Mail "Chloé claims she has the talent to succeed despite her name. She told BBC Breakfast: 'When it occurred to me that I wanted to go into TV, it was a proper decision because if I said yes the nepotism claims would start storming in."

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1132142/THATS-got-lingerie-contract-Chlo-Madeley-parties-night-away-low-cut-LBD.html 

She has the audacity to claim it is not nepotism but then  accepts jobs on her parent's shows. If we were in the same position we would surely all take every advantage of the opportunity we were given, it is a shame she cannot admit it herself.

I think everyone has an ability in some form to create a place for themselves in the media industry whether it be behind the scenes or infront of the camera, if given the chance. I have experience of this myself going for a job with virgin media television. Though I didn't get the job I asked about work experience, they told me that they rarely gave that out and if they did it was for relatives of those who already work there.

It remains to be seen whether Chole will make the most of the opportunity presented to her by her parents, if she doesn't no doubt Carol Vorderman's children will be waiting in the wings to seize their opportunity.

Snog, Marry Avoid (BBC Three, Mondays)

The second season of 'Snog, Marry Avoid' started on BBCThree last night (yeah, i missed the first season as well!) It's basically a show of that game you played in school, where you'd sit on a bench and say to your mate "would you hit that?" about every girl that walked by. Unfortunately this show isn't that basest; but its entertaining non-the-less. 

It revolves around dragging a load of deluded Jodie Marsh wannabes, in front of a 'computer' to slag them off to high heaven about their orange skin, before giving them an incredibly underwhelming Rikki Lake style 'make-under.' In the mean time they ask a bunch of horny blokes off the street if they would Snog, Marry Avoid the subject; all of them say avoid. 

Last night was interesting only for the fact that they had Chantelle Houghton from Celebrity Big Brother as one of the victims. I simply had no idea what a mess this girl had made of herself. I remember her as a naive blonde who disgraced herself by marrying that muppet who walked off Never Mind the Buzzcocks. Now she looks like Jodie Marsh's little sister, complete with disgusting fake breasts, bright orange 'tan', greasy hair extensions and painted on eye brows. 

They attempt to make her look 'normal' but its impossible, she is too far gone. What a waste of money, though im sure it sold a few copies of Zoo.

6/10

Dollhouse (Fridays Fox)

Joss Whedon's latest venture 'Dollhouse' premiered across the pond last night, and i have to admit i was fairly excited about seeing the pilot. Whedon is certainly a man with talent; something he displays in the last few seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer which, despite its quirky birth, turned into a dark and compelling series by the time it finished a few years back. 

Dollhouse has Wheadon in his element; Sci-Fi. It revolves around a group of Girls (and men i believe, though i couldn't tell in the Pilot) who are implanted with differing personalities and skills to allow them to carry out various missions at the behest of 'clients.' These missions could be spending a night with a guy or as we saw in this episode, rescuing the daughter of a rich business man. 

I couldn't have been more underwhelmed by this show; the star Eliza Dushku is nice enough to look at, but this is a role that demands she pull off many different personalities, and when she has her memory wiped, she must be robotic blank canvas. She can do neither, she simply doesn't have the range. Ironically I'm sure Sarah Michelle Geller would have been much better. 

The other "doll" is none other than Katya Kinski from Neighbours, who is one of the worst actresses i have ever seen in my life; how she has managed to command such a role should be documented in history books. That or she has a personal relationship with Whedon that hasn't yet surfaced. 

The show is all over the place, and the all important set up flashes by like lightning, it left me feeling totally confused and uninterested.  When Dushku, or 'Echo' as she is known in the series, takes on her first mission she is simply identical to the vacuous personality free 'doll' she plays when stumbling around the 'dollhouse.'  Shows live and die by their casting, and unfortunately i suspect this show will fall on the sword before we see its second season. 

There are some nice performances, Harry J. Lennix is brilliant as Echo's 'Handler' (hmm kinda like watchers in Buffy) and Rushmore Alum Olivia Williams throws down a solid turn as the manager of the operation. 

It's not enough though, make no mistake this was weak, uninspired nonsense.  A good looking cast does not make up for a lightweight story and terrible acting. As with 'Fringe' i certainly won't be rushing back to see another episode of this tat. 

4/10

Phoenix evokes Kaufman

Joaquin Phoenix is one of my all time favourite actors, but if his 'career transition' moves in the way i hope it does then he will almost certainly go down as a Hollywood legend.  Phoenix appeared on the fantastic David Letterman show this week looking disheveled, unkempt and frankly homeless.  He mumbled through one word answers and chewed gum throughout.  He gave the aura of a Hollywood A lister who has hit the hard stuff and gone into complete and utter meltdown. Lets face it the guy has form, he did spend a period in rehab for alcohol addiction a few years back, but if the hushed stories coming from 'sources'  who are 'close' to Phoenix are to be believed then this is all part of an elaborate hoax, which will make up part of a 'mockumentary' to be directed by Phoenix's brother in law Casey Affleck. 

Analysing the video, i suspect you could form an opinion either way; there are certainly moments in the video where Phoenix is supressing laughter and at the end of the interview Letterman is heard to say "good job" before the actor removes his shades and starts a conversation; on the other hand, Letterman certainly appears to grow tired of the skit by the end of the interview and his chewing gum comments certainly were not throw away. I haven't seen him smash a guest to pieces like this since his infamous 90's interview with Marilyn Manson.

This isn't the first time a performer has gone about his business this way; who can forget Andy Kaufman and his infamous stunts and skits which made him a huge star in the States.  He even appeared in eerily similar fashion on the Letterman show many moons ago....

Christian Bale interviews George W. Bush

A Bale of Bush - watch more funny videos

Generation Kill, Sundays, 10pm, FX.

Generation Kill continues tonight and it is turning out to be another sublime piece of television from HBO. Written and produced by the creaters of The Wire it follows a group of marines who are at the forefront of the 2003 invasion of Iraq. If you haven't seen The Wire then get on that quickly, if you have you will be familiar with the open end forumalic style of the show. Unlike most U.S. shows the structure of the episode doesn't have to adhere to adbreaks and the need to wrap each episode up in 1 hour. Generation Kill like The Wire is a novel and each episode is a chapter, which unfolds steadily and at its own pace. Doing so allows incredible characterisation and evolution of the world on screen. Generation Kill is based on the book of the same name which was adapted from a series of editorials in Rolling Stone magazine written by Evan Wright. Wright was inbedded within the marines and his accounts of war provide an unsanctioned view of the reality and hardships that these marines had to fight under. The lack of equipment is staggering (No desert camoflage, not enough batteries to operate night equipment to name two) The ineptitude of superior officers is horrifying. It is a stunning series that should now be the barometer of all future tv or film projects based on the Iraq war.

Highlight of the Past Week (BBC Breakfast)

Open your ears and enjoy the moment the BBC 'mistakenly' played Christian Bale's now infamous rant unedited in the early hours of the morning. 

The reaction of the flabbergasted 'news readers' is hilarious. The clip is followed by a groveling apology, clearly designed to ensure the Daily Mail and its pompous middle class twin set and pearl morons didn't start a virulent hate campaign, as they have done with Jonathan Ross and Carole Thatcher.

Kitchen Nightmares USA (Channel 4 9PM)

Wow, It's been a bad few months for Gordon Ramsay. A year or so ago Ramsay was the crown prince of British TV chefs; loud, brash, but ultimately an entertaining personality and an incredibly talented chef. Fast forward a few months and he's been revealed as a love rat ripe for a roasting on the casting couch of Jeremy Kyle. His adultery has not gone down well, and to be honest i wouldn't be surprised if he slowly melts off our screen gradually in a slow painful death; that would be a shame because despite his misgivings off screen, i do enjoy watching him on the screen. 

It got worse for Ramsay last week when his 'Great British Nightmares' vehicle, part of Channel 4's underwhelming 'Great British Food Fight,' caused a flood of complaints for the sheer amount of swearing pouring out of Ramsays gullet.  I'm not offended in the slightest by swearing; but to be honest 'Great British Nightmares' was a patched together, poorly made show, that gave free reign to some really unsavoury characters who swore more than Joe Pesci in Casino. 

Kitchen Nightmares is usually a great watch; seeing Ramsay transform the fortunes of a run down restaurant into a success story in a couple of weeks, and in the process creating some quality cooks is a joy to see.  Unfortunately the same cannot be said for the nauseating American version of the show.  

Since when did Gordon become a counsellor? The American show has him spend more time in dimly lit back rooms giving relationship advice to broken families and trying to save marriages on the brink, than actually teaching these deluded 'chefs' how to cook. 

In tonights episode he actually gets a son to write a letter to his dad, this is in between his usual impromptu demonstrative rants to camera in a back alley while the kitchen behind him explodes.

The show only comes to light when Ramsay gets in the face of a complete dunce of a chef who blames Gordon because he couldn't cook a fried egg.  Like many of these modern 'reality' shows real liberties are taken with the editing, creating situations and events that clearly didn't happen; its so obvious a ten year old could see the plot holes. 

Get Ramsay back in the Kitchen and out of the bloody Samaritans and we might just save this guys career before it explodes in all our faces. 

6/10

Mark Dolan Worlds...... and me

Whilst watching a dire merseyside derby in the F.A Cup replay, I flicked around to numb my boredom of what is normally a great game. Mark Dolan who I am familiar with from Balls of Steel and I briefly saw a part of the first in this series - which followed child geniuses. This time Mark was meeting the worlds most enhanced women. Yes you are asking the right question, Why? Well apparently Mark is very interested in the vacuous world of gigantic breast augmentation. Mark wanders along like a kid on a field trip to the natural history museum, gawping in amazment and feighing interest in equal measure. What strikes me most is this is Louis Theroux on valium -  the topics aren't outrageous, he asks questions, but they never provide anything innsightful. He comes across as a nice chap but you are left wondering why he is even there. His background is in comedy, so maybe this is a complete genius show I am not getting, where he is mocking everyone in his films. The one thing he seemed to establish in his closing monologue was that these women were being pushed by men. The epitome of this theory was represented in a very short man with a very large complex, highlight of my viewing was Mark standing opposite short man asking him if he was trying to act out his fantasies. The man who had a permanent scowl may or may not have been amused by this.

Advert Anonymous

WOW!!! This is just awful - these are supposed to bring joy according to the tag line. The problem is when in you make one of the most iconic adverts of all time, the gorilla ad set the bar too high. You cannot follow this up with a bunch of cars driving around an airport, then two brats raising eyebrows. Fallon are a great creative agency but after such an amazing advert with the Gorilla ad you have to be on the top of your game to keep that kind of quality up for a whole series of ads. Perhaps sticking with the animal theme would have been wiser, animals doing amazing things would have brought more smiles to people and help relate back to the original iconic ad.
Ideas that come to me now that would tie in with the animal theme are as follows.

1) A giraffe. Start on a close up on the eyes which slowly pulls out to see a giraffe wearing a helmet and sat in a race car with it's limbs poking out. Racing lewis hamitlon or in the desert breaking the sound barrier. Or driving a delorean before reaching 88 and travelling through time - we see the Giraffe's life in fast forward before returning to present day in the desert. To the music from this video



2) A lion. Close up on the lions eyes. Slowly pulling out to reveal the Lion stood in the doorway of an airplane high up about to sky dive. The lion jumps and starts to perform a series of skydiving stunts. With this music to accompany it. The Lion to jump from the plane on 16 secs.



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Todd Carty living legend

With such a busy weekend of tv action here is the fourth update today.

Todd Carty is fast becoming the tv highlight reel for 2009 by himself. Here is another clip of his magic.

The Office

In my opinion, as much as I like the UK version it's U.S. counterpart as surpassed his ancestor. Last night after the Superbowl the latest episode aired with an opening scene which was one of the funniest scenes in any Office episode on either side of the Atlantic. With the office failing to listern to Dwight (The Fire Marshall) regarding fire safety Dwight resorts to teach his colleagues a lesson by setting up a real life simulation. It is a must see.




Here is an Office extra:

Superbowl 43 off the field

Despite many highlights on the field, there were a few off it too. On the BBC's coverage lead presenter Jake Humphreys struggling forever and an age with the pronunciation of Steeler QB Ben Roethilsberger. Though he did manage to pronounce pundit Rod Woodson's name correctly an area he failed with last year when legend Jerry Rice was the pundit for the BBC.

However the greatest moment of this Superbowl and possibily any Superbowl in history was a moment so perfect, so random that words can not describe. The surprise is that it didn't take place on the field during the game but in the Half time show. Thank you Bruce.

Superbowl 43

After last years miracle in the final minutes from Eli Manning and David Tyree how could we top that? Yet Superbowl 43 matched last years majesty with an exciting match up with Arizona coming back from a 13 point deficit to lead with just a few minutes remaining. At half time and into the 3rd quarter the Cardinals looked out of it but rallied with some incredible catches from Larry Fitzgerald leading Arizona on the brink of history. 
However with enough time on the clock Big Ben drove the Steelers down the field in an 8 play 78 yard drive with a final pass to Santonio Holmes who pulled in a fading pass in the back right of the end zone in spectacular fashion. Holmes has been the Steelers dangerman throughout the playoffs and seeled the victory by somehow getting both his feet down in bounds as he fell out with three Cardinal defenders nearby. Larry Fitzgerald has to feel hard done by for losing out on the MVP which invariably goes to a player on the winning team. Larry played a stellar game, though marked out of it for the first half the offence worked well in the second half and it was Fitzgerald who produced two moments of magic to take his team into the lead. Number 11's second touchdown giving him the record for most touchdowns in post season moving ahead of the legendary Jerry Rice. The night belonged to the Steelers and in a rare occurance neither the Coach Mike Tomlin (The Youngest coach to lead a team to Superbowl Victory), Big Ben or MVP Holmes laid the victory on a assist from God. It was great to see them thank their fellow players and the people of Steeler Nation.

See the highlights here.